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7 good reasons to give up

thedog_admin — Mon, 14 Sep 2020 11:06:58 +0000

Feeling that everything is a waste of time? You're probably right. With these insights you can give up effortlessly.

1. A million years from now, there will be no documentation that you have ever existed

The truth is that within a few decades of your death, you will no longer exist in the memory of anyone else. In a hundred years, almost no documentation of you will survive and in a million years, nothing in terms of the universe’s age, de facto you never have existed

2. The human is a stupid animal

Humans, known mostly by their scientific nicknames Homo sapiens sapiens, are animals walking on two that believe until their last day to everything that will be told to them enough times in the first years of their life.

Dogs, for example, or cockroaches, do not fall captive to brainwashing, making them automatically superior to the sapiens.

3. Nothing will happen if you do nothing

In general, nothing happens if nothing happens (except at the quantum level, but that is the subject of another lack of motivation article).

It’s a matter of simple logic.

4. If it is not broken - do not repair it

You can fight any motivational quote. For example the well-known saying by Thomas Jefferson:

I’m a Great Believer in Luck. The Harder I Work, the More Luck I Have

So please know that the fortunes of former President Jefferson ended when he died in 1826 of rheumatism, intestinal and urinary problems, when he was in debt.

5. Actually doing something can be very tiring

The cemeteries are full of motivated people who took advantage of every second of their lives and did something for themselves and for humanity. Many of them got so tired that within a few decades their heart just couldn’t stand it anymore.

Do not say that we didn’t warn you.

6. The chance of being run over by a truck drops miraculously in inaction

It doesn’t matter if you drink or do not drink 4 glasses of water a day, your chances of being run over by a truck of any size will drop miraculously if you just stay home and never try anything.

7. Give up is very 2020

The field of giving up has improved miraculously in the last twenty years with the rise of the “I’m entitled” generation and reached its peak in 2020 in the corona crisis when even less can be done than actually we planned.

The post 7 good reasons to give up appeared first on The Dog Ate My News.

8 amazing places you have to visit before you die today

thedog_admin — Wed, 09 Sep 2020 20:49:10 +0000

You may not have time to enjoy the memories of this vacation, but maybe your next of kin will be able to tell about it in the obituary

You always wanted to visit Sicily, but suddenly realized you had a knife stuck in your neck?

Have you always dreamed of taking your family on a cruise in the Caribbean but to your huge surprise you woke up without kidneys?

Here are the hottest destinations for the next ten minutes, and it doesn’t even cost much.

1. Stairwell

Available, close, and always full of cigarette butts.

If you want to stay optimistic, then you can only step up from here. Make your way to the top.

2. Living room of your next door neighbors

It is said that the grass is always greener on the other side. This is an opportunity to see if this is true.

And who knows, if they are at home maybe they can call an ambulance.

3. The view from the window

If you are lucky (relatively speaking) and you are in a room with a window, and if you are even luckier and you are close to it, and if you are luckiest and there is a beautiful view from this window, then here you go.

4. The Caribbean

Assuming of course you happen to be in the Caribbean when the worst of all happened.

If not, then it’s really not your day.

5. "The Dog Ate My News" website

We are always available.

In the last few minutes smile enjoy a wide range of articles with rich, engaging, intelligent content and most importantly very very false.

We even have an article on amazing places you have to visit before you die today.

Recommended.

6. Hospital

A crowded place, dramatic in a bad way, creates a life and death atmosphere right from the beginning, and always smells like bleach.

And who knows, with proper care, you will even travel in the distant future to more hospitals.

7. Toilet

Available anywhere, at home or outside, and in the last minutes of your life there really is no need to be picky.

You can sit back, relax, and let go. Just let go.

That others will clean it later.

8. Afterlife

This is the irrevocable (truly irrevocable) invitation to see if everything you have heard of is indeed true, and most importantly, which religion was right.

Wouldn’t it be funny you prayed for the wrong god all this time?

The post 8 amazing places you have to visit before you die today appeared first on The Dog Ate My News.

7 ways to get rid of a body in the river

thedog_admin — Mon, 07 Sep 2020 10:15:32 +0000

We didn't say that you did it, but it is better to get rid of it fast. And no, we're not talking about your excess weight.

1. Reeds

A bank of every river has its own reeds. We know this because we’ve seen it in a few movies. They will hide everything except prophets in a basket.

2. Near a wolf den

If there is a wolf den living by the river, they will make the deceased disappear forever. It’s called brunch.

It is recommended to maintain a safe range of 3-4 kilometers, so that you won’t join it as a last course.

3. In the current

If anyone finds the deceased, it will be far from you, and the noise of running water will confuse the talented detectives.

Just make sure that this is not a seasonal stream.

4. Under a rock

It is heavy, it is large, and it is as strong as a rock.

Not every river has rocks, so if necessary gravel stones can do the job too.

5. Near the other bodies

In a row, column, or stack. For your consideration and your wild imagination.

Just be careful not to get caught in the act. Such cases have a tendency to get to the news.

6. Fish food

The river is basically a large aquarium just without the glass container, the filter equipment, the fake corals and the little treasure chests.

There are fish there and they are hungry. If you find piranha fish, just keep your distance.

7. Nile

The longest river in the world offers you not just one bank, but two! 4,132 kilometers of sheer pleasure, full of hiding places, pits, reeds, and also quite a few Egyptians, Ugandans, Burundians, Eritreans, Tanzans, Sudanese, Chadians, Kenyans and Rwandans, who better not notice you do what you do.

To sum up: getting rid of a body in the river is like watching porn – it is better to do it in private, unless you have a partner with a very open mind.

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Research: Drinking 4 glasses of water per day increases the probability to be run over by a truck

thedog_admin — Sun, 06 Sep 2020 13:46:27 +0000

A reseach made by well-known college found that drinking 4 glasses of water a day drastically affects your chances of being run over by a truck. All the details inside.

Have you been told that drinking water is important? That it is critical for your health? That if you do not drink, a policeman will come? Think again.

A study from a well-known college determined that drinking 4 glasses of water a day reduces the chance of dehydration, thus increasing the chance that you will leave the house at some point instead of being buried at the closest grave.

Such an exit from the house increases the probability that you will eventually cross the road, and in direct conclusion it increases your chances of being run over, among other things, by a truck.

The study did not determine what type of truck it was.

One researcher hinted that it would be worthwhile to occasionally look left and right before crossing the road. Another investigator drank 4 glasses of water and was unfortunately run over to death, so we could not get his response.

Further studies from around the world confirm these results.

Researchers from Lapland have gone out of their way and claimed that drinking 4 glasses of water causes the evil eye, especially during full moon nights, when emotional fog covers the moist soil, tears softly, and an expression of horror in its imaginary eyes. However, statistically the study has a significance of 0.07, so a large part of the scientific community did not accept the conclusions as published.

Researchers from Istanbul have argued that drinking a lot can cause urination, and therefore causes the rising of water levels which causes floods, in which huge trucks are washed away by the powerful current and crush everything in their path.

Researchers from a small university in Maseru, the capital of Lesotho, have warned that drinking 4 glasses of water a day can do much more harm. People who survive because they drink water regularly can cause harm not only to themselves. They are able to drop a piano on the head of an innocent passerby, commit a massacre and even go to war. Researchers called living people a “ticking bomb.”

The most amazing study was conducted in the Pacific Ocean, and included a truck, 4 glasses of water and a brave experimenter. He was run over after drinking 3 glasses so the study could not be completed.

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